Big, Bad, Ranty Rant.

It's that time.
TL;DR: my life is shit and I'm just going to complain about my first world problems for a bit.

Have you ever had one of those days that just brought everything together? Like, one thing happens, and then another thing happens, and before you know it, your whole life just seems like one big pot of rotten doggy-doo? 

I'm having one of those days. It started off okay. I did school drop-off, and even got a great park! Then, I went to the library to pickup the book that they told me was waiting for me......except it wasn't. Waiting for me, that is. Whatever. No biggy. I'm currently reading two books anyway! (The Explosive Child by Ross Greene, and The Longest Ride by Nicholas Spark; in case you were wondering)
Get in my car to come home and realise I forgot to put petrol in my car last night. Then remember I left my purse on the bench. (Lucky that book wasn't ready - I wouldn't have been able to borrow it anyway!) This later turns into a hilariously depressing issue.
Get home and binge watch some Pretty Little Liar... I'm now up to s5e18. WOO! Had some funny chats on fb, a great phone call from a friend.... The kind of day that makes up for the barely registered crap of the morning. 

Then it goes downhill... I get a phone call from someone close to me. Basically, they won't be around for my birthday this year. Granted, my birthday isn't until September, but that's beside the point! This is a big year!! I'll be 21!!!! (with a *cough* few years experience) Whatever. That hurt, but not a lot.
Next up: a phone call from the occupational therapist saying there's been a cancellation and they can see Spawn on Monday. GREAT!! We're on a care plan to help with this whole potential ASD diagnosis process, so I'm glad to be seeing her earlier. Spawn really needs help getting a grip (literally) at school. Then I find out it's going to set me back over $200. YAY. Have I mentioned I'm a single mum? Most of you probably know that, but figured I should put it out there. Bring on the pity party.......or not.
So this $220, plus the speech therapist fees (no idea how much she's charging - less than the OT I assume), plus my own medical expenses.... Can you see where I'm heading???
TODAY SUCKS.

So then I go to pick up Spawn. Get to the roundabout... Wait for incompetent morons to navigate the roundabout.... Car stalls. WHAT THE FRUITCAKE?! I never stall!!! I'm a perfectly competent manual driver!!! Realise car is out of petrol. Servo is 200m from the roundabout.... Am fortunate enough to live in a nice enough neighbourhood, so a local tradie helps me get to the servo. Yay tradies! :)

I know it doesn't sound like much, but it is. Especially when I'm battling depression and trying to come to terms with the possibility of my son receiving a medical label in the near future. It's just hard, ya know?? 

I want a job. I want money. I want to live in a better house, that has proper heating and cooling. I want to be rid of this depression. I want to be healthy. I want to be stress-free. I don't want to be so isolated. I want to stay in this great community I'm in, but also want to move closer to friends and happiness.
I just want to be happy. Why is happiness so hard to achieve?? It's the one thing every person is born with, yet have that happiness leave you and it's mission: impossible, to get it back. 
 
Peace out.

- L. x