Pizza Scrolls

This is without a doubt, one of my favourite recipes! There are so many ways to mix it up, and they're the perfect size to fit in Spawn's Yumbox! They're the thing I always make for play dates, or during lunch prep (like today!) as they freeze really well.

INGREDIENTS:
2 cups self-raising flour
90g butter, (room temp) cut into small cubes
pinch of salt
1/2 tspn lemon myrtle (optional - I use it with certain topping combinations to spice up the dough)
2/3 cup milk
plain flour, for dusting
Pizza sauce (or tomato paste/chutney/whatever you like - think of it as a pizza base, which it is!)
Grated cheese - I use pizza blend, as it melts really well.
**the following is a base recipe: alternate as desired! I occasionally make them vegetarian by using sliced roast vegetables, etc)
150gm (approx) smoked ham, chopped
Small tin pineapple pieces, drained
You can also add mushrooms, salami, bacon, etc. I did today's batch super simple, as I forgot to buy a bunch of stuff at the supermarket yesterday. Grrr.

METHOD:
Preheat oven to 210° and line baking trays with baking paper.
Sieve flour into bowl and then add salt and butter. Rub until the butter is combined with the flour - vaguely resembles breadcrumbs.
Add milk and use a round-bladed knife to 'cut' the milk into the mix, until just combined.
Flour surface and rolling pin, then tip dough onto bench (this is where I add myrtle/other herbs to bread), and knead until combined.
Roll dough until it's as thin as you can get it, without it falling apart. Length will vary, but you should aim to have it approximately 20cm wide - too much wider and they start getting a bit fat to fit into bento compartments, and get too big to be 'bite size'.
Spread sauce onto dough, then thinly sprinkle meat (or alternative) onto dough, followed by a sprinkle of cheese (don't use too much or the cheese goes everywhere - I speak from experience, during a cheesymite attempt, LOL!), and then pineapple, if using. Do not place toppings too close to top/bottom edges, as it all shifts during the rolling process.
Roll lengthwise, carefully and tightly, then if needed, brush a little milk to seal the edge. Then, cut into bite-sizes scrolls (I do mine about an inch thick) and place cut-side up on the tray. You need to leave enough space between the scrolls for them to expand, but I find that leaving too much space between causes them to dry out a little. Find that middle ground.... I think it's about 1cm apart. I'm not much of a measurer - always do things by sight!
Then put in oven for 25-30 minutes, until golden and yummy. If you're a scentsy* lover like me, feel free to turn them off during the baking process, so you can enjoy the heavenly aroma. :)

Peace out.

- L. x

Make sure you watch them towards the end, they go from done to DONE really quickly if you get distracted! 

*scentsy link directs to a consultant friend of mine - she's lovely. :)
**This recipe was originally found on Taste, however I have changed it a fair bit to suit my own tastes.

'Indebted' [Book Review]

On April 17 2015, my life will change, again. 
April 17 is the day 'Third Debt' is released. (Technically, it will be April 18 for me - damn slow Amurkins!)

What is 'Third Debt', I hear you ask??
Third debt is the fourth book in Pepper Winters 'Indebted' series. This series is dark. It's captivating. It's not a happy story. It's twisted. It borders on perverse. And it is one of the BEST series I have read! Which says a lot, considering the amount of reading I do.

Short version?
Meet Nila Weaver. Nila is an innocent daughter caught in a family feud as old as time. Due to a dispute some years ago, Nila has to repay a debt to the Hawks. She doesn't know this though; not until she is captured by none other than Jethro Hawk.
Jethro Hawk is amazing. He is bad to the bone. Heartless. A true Hawk.......or is he?
Jethro is the one who extracts the debts from Nila, but things do not go to plan. Jethro is not who he appears. Not by a long shot.

In order to repay the debts, Nila is taken from a work thing and forced to live at the Hawk mansion (which is based on Waddesdon Manor, one of the most breathtaking places I have ever seen!!!), where she meets the Hawk family - including the gruesome Cut - and learns of her family history.

Each book focuses on a debt, and as the debts go on, they get more and more intense... I cannot wait to see what the third debt shall entail! Six (or so) days to go until I find out!!!!
Six days is more than enough time to read the series to date. The first book, Debt Inheritance, can be found here (or on iBooks, B&N, etc), and is currently FREE. What better way to become trapped in the world of Jethro and Nila. <3

To date, I give this series 4.5 stars. I'd give it five stars, but I cried in the last book, soooo.... (I'm a sook; I cry watching cartoons!!!)

Peace out.

- L. x

Waddesdon Manor

This or That? Here or There? Now or Later?

Too many decisions. Life needs a map, where you can look at where you want to go, and then make the appropriate choices. Although, I do like randomly driving and trying to figure out how to reach my destination without a map. I can see why males like to do this. It's very appealing, if you have shares in BP or similar. ;)

So, ever since the diagnosis process began, I have been confronted with more choices than I thought possible. Because apparently, parenting a 'normal' child (I use the term loosely) isn't already hard enough. Now I need to decide which OT to see, which social programs to enrol Spawn into, which path to take in regard to his speech problems, what diet to put him on, how to manage meltdowns in a way that won't send him into sensory overload, and my favourite: whether or not to go to the crowded supermarket, or have cereal with water in the morning???

Ahh, life. You never fail to disappoint, that's for sure! But just once, could you find it in your heart to send me on an easy path??? Do you not think I've made enough tough choices yet? How much more does one person have to endure, before they can just settle down and be happy??? CAN a person ever settle down and be happy? Does a person ever reach the limit of shit they're going to be dealt??
A religious person would say, "God never gives you more than He thinks you can handle". That's bollocks. A person can handle most things, but not because they want to; because there is no alternative. Nobody wants to watch someone they love die of cancer. Nobody wants to watch their child grow up to be "different". Everybody wants the best for everyone they love. It's human nature to want this. So why does "He" think certain people deserve to experience such brutality? Hmmmm??? God sucks. You hear that God??? YOU SUCK.
Pfft, God. What gives one being the right to make choices for everyone???? Some say that each individual is responsible for the paths we take in life. I used to think this, but now I genuinely believe we are all puppets, and that God is a sinister son-of-a-*ahem*, sitting up there laughing at the puppet show on display before him.

Yeah, I'm a little angry today.

Peace out.

- L. x

Nobody's Perfect.

I make no claim to be perfect. Apparently I give off some uppity vibe that leaves people thinking I'm either up myself, b*tchy, a know-it-all, or all of the above.
I'm not.

I've faked confidence and happiness for so long that people misconstrue it for something it isn't.
I'm not being cocky when I make factual statements; I'm smart, therefore I know stuff. If you don't want to know something, don't ask the question. I'm of the impression that questions are to be answered, unless they're obviously rhetorical.
I'm not being a bitch when you walk up to me unannounced and I'm deep in concentration/in my own world; I have resting bitch face and selective hearing, due to a five year old who never. shuts. up.
When I have my fake smile on that looks more like a grimace, it's not because I can't stand to be around you; it's because on the inside, I'm dying a little every day, and every day it gets a little harder to pretend.
If I tell a stupid little lie that is obviously untrue, it's not because I'm a liar: it's because I'm afraid to tell the truth. Afraid to be judged. Afraid I'm going to be found wanting. Afraid someone will look at me a little too closely and see this facade that I wish were true, if only for a minute. Because Lord forbid I let it be known that I'm in the pits of depression, green with envy as all my friends fulfill their dreams, while I'm stuck in this pit. This hell. This pathetic thing known as my life.
And when I'm quick to lose my temper at you, it's not because I'm a cow. It's because I've been burnt far too many times and am now forever afraid to let new people in.

So the next time you come across someone who seems like a snobby bitch, don't be quick to give them the flick. You never know when being the first to say "hello" will make a person's day.

Peace out.

- L. x

There's a war inside my head.

Sometimes I wish that I was dead, I'm broken.

I'm tired of trying to be normal
I'm always overthinking
I'm driving myself crazy
So what if I'm f*cking crazy?!

Do you ever hear a song and think to yourself: THAT'S MY SONG!!?
I do this. I do this a lot. Obviously, it depends on my mood - and my state of mind - as to whether certain songs are fitting of the ramblings inside my head.

Today though... Today is an "I'm gonna show you crazy" day. My dad left this morning after spending eight whole days here. Well, technically 8.5, but who was counting?! Don't get me wrong, I love my dad (most days) but he can be a bit......old-fashioned, for lack of a better word. This whole diagnosis process with Spawn is intense, and he's been so well behaved the past couple of weeks, so I was hoping to minimise the risk of meltdowns. We did good; he only had two or three, and only one was intense. Yay!
However, dad was so quick to insult him, just like he did to me when I was younger. Spawn freaked out at the shopping centre (understandable, given his sensory issues!) and then my dad proceeded to berate him and call him a baby for the rest of the afternoon. With Spawn being Spawn, he has "Poppy" on this massive pedestal, and I could see the sadness overtaking the spark in his eyes. It literally made my heart crack. Why are people so quick to shame kids for having a tantrum?? If they only took a moment to try and understand WHY the child was having a fit, they could resolve the problem in a much more peaceful way. Instead, my dad did what he does best, and I spent the rest of the afternoon feeling guilty for not standing up for Spawn, as I didn't want to create an even bigger scene in the shopping centre.

Ughhh, mummy guilt is the worst. Even now, thinking about it makes me sick. I'm sorry Spawn. I promise to never again put my own pride above your happiness. I will always stand up for you, even if it means being the bad guy to everyone else. <3

Plus side; he left me his Chromecast - YES! Best thing ever. Easy streaming of Netflix to my TV for dayyyysssssssss.

In other crazy news: Easter. Chocolate. Sugar. Tantrums. HEADACHE.
I ate too much chocolate. Spawn ate a tiny Lindt bunny, which is all it takes to send him troppo. So he's been feral all afternoon. And I'm over here going crazy from excessive noise and chocolate overload. Ain't Easter fun?!!!!

How do you say chocolate in Italian? Cioccolato. That's my new thing for today!
And Spawn's word for the week is 'discombobulated'. It sounds nothing like that when it comes out of his mouth, but he's trying and it's super adorable!! "I'm discombobulated this morning, mummy." Love this kid.

In wrapping this up, I'm just going to put it out there that I could REALLY go some poutine right now! Canada, why you so far away??? I want to visit you. I want to inhabit you. I want to own you. Let's be friends, always?

Peace out.

- L. x

P.S. In trying to find an image containing both chocolate AND poutine, I came across this?!!! WHAAAAAAT?! Puke or want? I'm not sure....

Slammed [Book Review]

I haven't had a whole lot of spare time these past couple of weeks, due to school holidays and stuff, but I have managed to read Colleen Hoover's series 'Slammed'. It's so addictive and cute, albeit a little sad at times.

The first book in the series, aptly titled 'Slammed', is written from Layken's POV. Layken is a teenager who moves to Ypsilanti, a small town in Michigan, after her father dies and her family is forced to leave their Texan home. She then meets Will, the similarly aged boy across the road, and his younger brother Caulder, who quickly befriends her younger brother, Kel.
I don't want to spoil the series, so won't go into details, but it's good. They get into slam poetry, which is a passion of Will's, and then there's some sad bits. A lot of funny bits too, though. :)

The second book in the series, 'Point of Retreat', is written from Will's POV, which is refreshing after seeing everything from Lake's POV in the first book. You learn that Will has had a bit of a rough time in the past, and after the events of the first book, you can't help but feel for him. He's so adorable. :)
Like most series, there is a big "incident" that rocks Will & Lake's relationship, and I became so engrossed that I read the book into the early hours of the morning, as I needed to know how it ended!
The ending didn't disappoint, that's for sure.

The third book, 'This Girl' is also written from Will's POV. It focuses on events that occurred in Slammed, but this time we get to see what Will was thinking during those hilarious first encounters. It also simultaneously follows on from the events that occurred at the end of Point of Retreat, so you get to see how Will & Lake are doing now. Whilst I enjoyed reading Will's take on earlier events, I did find this book to be a little repetitive at times, as some of these things were touched on in the previous book.

Overall, I give this series 4 stars and recommend romance fans read the series, if they haven't already. It's cute, and not a storyline that has been overdone, like many others. It was well-written and the poetry featured throughout the series was great, and has me wanting to try and write some slam poetry of my own! (Although, I severely lack the creativity required to slam, unfortunately!)

Peace out.

- L. x

Autism Awareness Month.

As some of you may know, Spawn is currently undergoing an ASD diagnosis. I'm not kidding when I say it is long, expensive, exhausting and scary. But you know what I've learned this year? It's okay to fear the unknown. There is so much out there that none of us know (including what actually causes ASD!?), yet people can become so accustomed to their own little bubble of safety, that they never expect to have to deal with something as scary as ASD.
I have to admit, the first time I heard the word 'autism' in relation to my son, I almost burst into tears. I see autistic kids as being those super intelligent children who cannot talk, never show emotion, and live extraordinary lives that are anything but normal. All I wanted (and I'm assuming most parents would feel the same way) was for my child to grow up having lots of friends, confidence, and maybe some skills in the athletic world. Instead, I'm learning that Spawn has sensory processing issues, which explains some of his behaviour and his incessant need to touch myself (and others) to the point where it gets annoying. Which often results in guilt. Why is my son touching me annoying?? I should welcome his touch, right??! WRONG. You don't need to have sensory processing issues to become overwhelmed by constant touching. It's like having a stage five cling-on partner - ain't nobody got time for that!
So don't feel bad if your child is too touchy. You don't have to feel guilty because some parents wished their child would touch them at all. Everybody is experiencing different things, and just because one person's problems are not as bad as another persons does not make them irrelevant. It just means that some people are at a point in their life where having the wrong shade of pink nail polish on their toes is a total disaster, while others are rocking in a corner wondering if it's all their fault that their child is 'different'.
However, a little consideration does go a long way! I recommend using the filter between your brain and mouth whenever you're in a social setting, purely to avoid any potential awkwardness. :)

So anyway, I digress (a little). April is Autism Awareness Month, and the month kicks off with a 'wear blue on April 2' theme, in order to help spread awareness.
Autism is more than just the a-typical "autism" that most people grew up understanding. As of 2013, Autism - or Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) as it's now known - now encompasses all disorders on the spectrum, including the high-functioning Asperger Syndrome.

Many people comment on how children don't look like they have autism. ASD is not a deformity that leaves a person with visual anomalies. ASD makes a person special. Unique - more-so than others. ASD means that a child can have difficulty handling normal social situations, such as a trip to the supermarket, a school assembly, or understanding a person's boundaries. ASD means a person sees the world a little differently than us 'normal' folk, but that is in no way a bad thing. Can you imagine how amazing it could be to see the world in more than just black and white? To see yellow and blue and green and all the other colours of the spectrum??? I truly believe that 'normal' people are the ones who should be looked at with pity.

So the next time somebody tells you that their child has ASD, do yourself a favour; don't look at them with pity, or move away thinking they're contagious. Stop and have a conversation with them, if they're able. It could be one of the most enlightening conversations of your life. :)

If you're curious to read more about Autism Spectrum Disorder, there is plenty of information available, some of which can be found:
here
and here
and even here.

And if you're curious about the ASD diagnosis process, some information relating to how it's done in Australia can be found here. If you think someone you know may have ASD, the diagnosis process can be long and confusing, so don't be afraid to ask your GP questions, or go see a paediatrition/psychologist.

Peace out.

- L. x

Chasing waves at Bells Beach!